I really hate so much right now. I work like a damn dog and I wish I didn't. My heart's pretty much broken and it's been broken for pretty much years over stuff I can never change. That's probably what kills me the most about everything that's going on. That I live through it with a broken heart.
I've pretty much felt alone for most of my life. The only person I've ever really felt completely myself with stopped talking me after 14 years. I guess that's a thing called life for you. I'm just sick of people and the things they say. Sometimes I wish I wasn't so scared about so much. I feel like no matter what I do I'll never feel content about anything in my life.
Just everything seems so off to me. Even all the good stuff that's happened to me this year. It all seems sort of like the world and fate are just building up for something completely horrible to happen to me. Everybody knows nothing good happens without something terrible waiting to happen right behind it. I'm waiting for the bad stuff to drop on me.
I SEE CARTEL IN A COUPLE OF DAYS & NEWF RIGHT AFTER THAT. I CAN NOT WAIT TO SEE THEM.